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Taken For Granted

Updated: Apr 27

Feeling of "taken for granted" is quite demotivating. It can make you feel invisible and insignificant.

This can happen with your partner or with your parents or with your in-laws or with your boss or all of them.

The one that hurts the most is when your partner takes you for granted.

When you feel taken for granted, then you feel

  • ‌unsupported

  • ‌unrecognised

  • ‌unappreciated

  • ‌controlled and dictated

  • ‌invisible and insignificant

Bad news is that research shows nearly 60% of married women feel this way. Good news is that you don't have to, if you don't want to. We acknowledge that this is a wide-spread problem but it's not very hard to solve it. One of the biggest reasons for this problem to be so common is that it requires self-reflection to solve and most people believe that it is a doing of others. It is not their fault.

That may be correct but you are getting impacted by how others are behaving. As an adult, you know that you can't change another person. So really, you have only 2 possible choices:

  1. Do nothing, wait for others to change and stay impacted till that happens

  2. Take control and reclaim your happiness

If you wish to take control, then we can help. We have been providing Relationship Coaching for more than 25 years and using all that experience, we have created a simple 3Cs solution as follows:

  1. Contemplate: Spend some quality time to identify your childhood patterns that trigger these feelings in you as adult. Almost every unwanted feeling has roots in the past. It's easy to get to those roots by doing a little self enquiry.

  2. Clarity: Spend some quality time to clearly define ‌• how you would like to be treated •‌ how would you feel when that happens ‌• how would your relationship with your partner transform

  3. Clean: After completing the previous 2 steps, it is now time to detox; to clean your body and mind of the unwanted patterns. Along with cleaning these patterns, also coach your partner about how you wish to be communicated.

You can't change others.

But you can shield yourself and be happy.

Your happiness will inspire them to change also.

We have launched a Do-it-yourself (DIY) journey on this topic covering the 3Cs solution. It includes:

  • ‌clarification videos

  • ‌contemplation questions

  • ‌assessments

  • ‌worksheets

  • ‌action plans

  • ‌guided meditations to assist cleaning

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