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Peaks and Valleys

Updated: Apr 27

I use these 2 words a lot in my conversations - wounds and healing.


I know that they are quite self-explanatory words and yet I feel to write more on them today.



Wounds are our Unhealthy Conditionings!

From early childhood, we experience incidents that leave a mark on us. In coaching language, we call these incidents, defining moments. They get so engraved on our psyche that even 30, 40 years later, if I give my client a command to take me to the earliest memory, they will get there in a heartbeat.


When we faced those defining moments, we created a coping mechanism. It was our best shot to handle the situation. And considering that we are still here, that coping mechanism did help us to survive. That's the good part.


The downside is that in majority of cases (not saying all cases), these coping mechanisms create Unhealthy Conditionings. They work but they also leave a mark. They leave wounds!


Unfortunately, we don't recognise and realise this downside and just like a parasite, these Unhealthy Conditionings make home in our subconscious. Years later, we forget those incidents but this parasite never leave us. Why? Because we don't even know it's there. How can we solve a problem if we don't even know it exists?



Healing means getting rid of this parasite!

Although we don't recognise our wounds quickly but there is an easy way to identify them.


If an incident makes you uncomfortable, hesitant, resistent, argumentative, defensive, justifying, irritable, anxious, stressed, angry, sad, depressed, withdrawn, guilty, shameful, embarrassed, confused, fearful and so on, then you have stepped on a wound.


It is never about the other person...



The healing involves an internal battle with this parasite.

And how would you know that you have healed?

The next time a similar incident happens, you will feel absolutely sure and grounded in your own truth regardless of what others think. Those feelings will not arise!



Ready to go on such Healing Journeys?





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Vanshika Garg
Vanshika Garg
23. März 2022

Beautiful....so clear insightful and to the point....i wish somebody explained this way before..... So much of clarity i got from reading this...hats off to you

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