Emotional Triggers are strong intense emotional responses that arise with emotions such as anger, sadness, frustration, worry, guilt, shame, abandonment, helplessness, rejection, or many different kinds of fears,
which stems from memories, experiences, or events which were traumatic.
They make us react, regardless of our current mood. They get triggered by events or situations in the present.
Identifying and working on healing the past trauma is crucial to your well-being, as well are for your #relationships
Here are the five points that will give you more clarity while you are on the healing journey:
1) All responses are not triggers. They could merely responses coming from only your present situation.
Even though we use the sentence 'I am triggered' when we get any of these lower densely vibrating emotions, they are not all wounds. Not all of them arise out of trauma.
How do we find the difference?
Become more self-aware. Observe the body, mind, and emotions,
how their intensity decreases and how lesser attached you get to it within a period.
Identifying them. Bringing Mindfulness and Awareness every time these emotions arise.
How?
🌷Connect with your Body Sensations
🌷Connect to your Breath
🌷Watch your thoughts
Go back in time, and contemplate. Let the answers flow to you. When was the last time you felt that? Go back and back until you felt it for the first time?
Identifying the source of a trigger reaction — a specific event or trauma — is central to freeing ourselves from it. Triggers based on past trauma show us where the past invades the present. But they also allow us to look directly into the hidden world of who we are. When you accurately locate where a trigger comes from, You'll notice that you can usually reduce its intensity substantially.
If these triggers impact you repetitively, it stays in your thoughts and body for a long time, and their intensity is high. Then, it is a trigger arising out of a wound.
If these emotions just arise and as soon as the incident is over and you start continuing your things normally, they are not triggers.
If you are working on healing your triggers, here is a list of the healing methods you can follow.
🌷Take a pause before reacting. Before and after.
🌷Do Inner Child Healing and Shadow Work.
🌷Own your Feelings, connect with them/
🌷Start Communicating Clearly
🌷Identify Toxic Relationship patterns
🌷Maintain a journal and express to yourself, keep a track
2) Your triggers are not your enemies, they actually are your best friends.
The people who trigger you are also not your enemies, but they are allowing you to see what’s inside you.
We miss the point because we focus only on the outside,
Awareness of yourself is where the focus needs to shift, for evolution.
Your triggers are constantly showing,
The parts of you, you need to heal.
It’s not the other who triggers you,
It’s about what inside you got you triggered.
You also don’t have to fight your triggers, or fix yourself,
But merely bring awareness to them,
The transmutation happens itself.
3) It’s okay to feel what you feel, All emotions are valid.
Allowing your feeling to get processed is the most important part of healing oneself.
We react so fast,
But if we pause for a moment,
Watch the mind,
Watch the sensations in the body.
Acceptance happens.
You still feel all the emotions, you don’t become it.
4) Bring your focus to Repeating Patterns in your Life. Also, use it with the help of other people.
Observing your repeating patterns in life is an opportunity for you to find what triggers you. When you observe any repeating pattern and your response is the same to it. Its time for you to sit and contemplate,
"What makes me feel this way again and again?"
"What is triggering the same reaction in me" How to do this?
Mirroring - one of the most crucial shadow work exercises which will help you bring awareness to your repeated patterns.
The world is a reflection of us, how we radiate.
It is within and without.
We are mirrors to others, and so are others to us.
Be it individual consciousness,
Or collective,
We all are mirroring it,
Each part represents something of the whole,
And the whole represents something of the part.
All teachers, and all students.
The law of mirroring says,
First, Everything that bothers me triggers me, and I want to change in others, is what I want to change inside me.
Second, Everything that the other criticizes in me, or judges in me, if I end up triggered, it is repressed in me, and I judge myself for it too.
Third, Everything I love about others is also inside of me.
Fourth, Everything that others want me to change in me, but I am not triggered by it, I leave it to them.
In brief, what you love or hate in others is about the parts of you.
What others love and hate in you is about them. But if what they dislike about you triggers you, it’s again about you and you need to pay attention to it.
Try it actually in the front of a mirror, and talk to your splits within, looking straight in your eyes.
Let it reveal to you, about you. Embrace it with love, all that comes.
5)Focus on Reflection, avoid projection
Hurt people, Hurt People.
We make others feel the way we feel.
A friend said to me a few days back, “I have seen so much pain in my life. I had to beg for the smallest thing I needed…… You haven’t faced what I have faced in my life. You would never understand me and my struggles because you have not cried for every small thing in your life. You are lucky, I was not. My dad couldn’t provide for us and I always had to compromise…….”
He went on like this for hours of this.
I was listening and I had to tell him, ‘You are right. I have not gone through what you have. So I can’t understand’
Well, when it comes to trauma, in society, we have created labels and comparisons for it. How painful one’s journey was compared to others.
But do we all process the pain similarly?
Is there any single way to measure anyone’s trauma?
What is Trauma?
Does it only happen when we face some harsh abuse or watch it happening in our environment?
Indeed.
To collectively heal from this, to be more sensitive and connected, we need to understand trauma is more than that.
It’s also verbal, physical, sexual, mental, and emotional abuse. The way it is categorized and it appears in TV shows. But it’s not a stereotype. It’s not a fixed type or category.
It’s not quantifiable or comparable between two people, two journeys, or two situations.
You see, there is no perfect parenting, because no matter how much people try, at some or other point the child will interpret it based on their perception and understanding.
And it’s fine to give that liberty to a soul to go through a journey of their own.
We can always minimize the impacts as a parent by being more conscious, and detached, respecting their sovereignty, giving them space to blossom, etc.
But that doesn’t eliminate all Trauma.
Trauma is simply anything that overwhelms a person’s capacity to handle something and does not have the resources to process the stress of that experience.
Maybe your parents weren’t available to support you through experiences or maybe they thought they were but didn’t give you what you needed.
Either way, the body interprets that lack of availability as a threat to your safety. And that’s enough to get stored in the nervous system as trauma.
So the point is not how big or small it is.
There is no comparison.
No, you didn’t cause it. It’s not your fault.
So, is it not another person whom you project this on.
Now, what we do is our responsibility.
Do you want to let it keep ruling your life,
Project it on others, and keep repeating the cycle.
Or take the responsibility to heal and live differently?
Taking Responsibility to reflect rather than project and your trauma on others is the first most important step we need to take to heal our emotional triggers.
Hope this helps. Sending a lot of love to you.
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