top of page

Detachment ≠ Disconnect

Updated: Aug 10, 2022

You only lose what you cling to.
Detachment is not the elimination of desires, but only knowing you are not all that changes.
It is freedom, free to make new concepts, yet free from concepts. Free to own, yet not owned by it.
To be in this world, fully... Yet not of it...

Wikipedia says, "Nonattachment, non-attachment, or detachment is a state in which a person overcomes their emotional attachment to or desire for things, people or worldly concerns and thus attains a heightened perspective." Detachment isn't about not being involved in the world around you or giving up on your goals. Instead, it involves surrendering control, playing the play, and surrendering with trust in the universe. It is being fully present, living each moment the way it is, knowing that this is all that exists. When you grow in detachment you will become not more aloof, but more joyful. That is the criterion of all that is good. Joy is the criterion. If you are growing in joy, you are growing, and you are getting towards home….If you are moving into detachment, love will grow, joy will grow, and only attachments will drop — because attachments bring misery, and bondage, and destroy your freedom.


When nothing belongs to you, you own everything.


Let's begin with a story before we talk about detachment... I met a guy 2 years ago.


He said, ''Ahh! I am an out-of-site, out-of-mind person. It's too easy for me to let go. A person leaves the place and I am completely over them. I don't care anymore''


Sounds Zen, right?


What a great person, always living in the moment. I wanted to believe want he said and get inspired by it.


But I started seeing a pattern when I observed that man for a little while.


A pattern of not getting involved in things at all. Everything he did was shallow. He was so afraid to go into the depths of anything. Any relationship, anything that required any kind of commitment, sharing of emotions, a deep knowingness.


After observing him from a few conversations and meetings, I saw his fear of getting hurt or left behind, or abandoned was so much,


that he has decided not to get truly involved with anything only.


So, if he doesn't attach himself to anything, he wouldn't have to do the difficult task of detaching.


But is that what detachment is?


That is what disconnecting is.


Detachment in my experience has been the complete opposite.


It is full of attachments, full of vulnerability, and full of deep connections. But yet there is no tight rope holding anything to anything.


And one cannot detach unless they first allow themselves to be fully attached and experience the connection.


That opens your heart.

To fully take a deep dive and even drown/surrender completely in the unfathomable oneness.


The detachment is not disconnecting.

It is taking absolute ownership, absolute attachment, and Love, Yet remembering it's not permanent.


To welcome everything, let it come fully,

And being graceful, when it goes.


and the letting go will not be a letting go,

If you didn't allow it to come only.


Can you let go of something that you never had?

"Detachment does not mean, you should own nothing,


It means that NOTHING SHOULD OWN YOU"



I haven't written this quote. But this is so powerful, that in past years, whenever I read it, it reminds me of something really deep.


Owning things, possessions, or desires of any kind is fine.


But how would you react if you lost your possessions,

if you lose a family member,

if you face a breakup,

if you lost something you love?


You have to be the person who drives the vehicle of your life.

Not things or other people.


If you keep assuring yourself that,


If I get this much money, then I'll be happy

If I get this position, then I'll be happy

If I have roamed some 100 countries, then I'll be happy

If I have this phone or car or house, then I'll be happy


The list is never-ending.


If you think this way? Its high time to understand that, these things own you,


Not you are owning them!

To be deeply in love,

but yet not own anything,


This moment where nothing belongs to me,

so everything is mine,


To be in this world, deeply connected,

but not of it.


Detachment is not a state which lacks love,

rather it's the state of the deepest, truest, purest, godly, expression of love.


Detachment is having it all,

yet not owned by any of it.


Detachment is full of responsibility,

but yet it owes nothing to anyone.


 

Detachment is living life in the Flow. Flow is doing non-doing.


It’s neither not doing anything nor just sitting on the couch,

Nor running behind the endless desires and never being still.


It’s living in the present moment,

Doing what needs to be done,

Giving the best,

Enjoying and loving it all,


And then when you move to the next moment,


Repeating it.


Moment to moment.

 

Here are some words from Daniel Schmidt which remained with me.... Do not try to be free of desires, Because wanting to be free of desires is a desire. You can't try to be still, because your very effort is movement. Realize the stillness that is already always present,

Be the stillness and know.✨


When all preferences have dropped the source is revealed, But do not even cling to the source, the great reality.🌷


If you believe what is said, you have missed it. If you disbelief, you have also missed it. Belief and disbelief, operate on the level of mind. They require knowing.✨


But if you enter into your investigation,

Examining all of the aspects of your being,

Finding out who is doing the investigating.✨


If you are willing to live by the principle, "Not my will, but higher will be done"


If you are willing to travel beyond all-knowing, then you realize what I have attempted to point towards.


- Excerpt from - Samadhi Part 2 by AwakenTheWorldFilm.



 

Desires are not something bad. They are merely desires. This universe wouldn't exist if it had not desired to exist. So what are we fighting?


They are yours. Unique to you.


You cannot be free of desires.

And all those who tell you, you can be.


Just listen to your heart beating once.


The existence was born out of nothingness,

Because there was a DESIRE.


Trying to be free of desires,

Is a desire in itself.


You cannot be free of it, because you are expanding, and you cannot expand without a desire.


Desiring something is not what causes suffering, It’s the separation, which causes it.

That you are separate from your desires.

You are separate from existence itself.


Life is an illusion, a play. But that would not mean right that we should stop playing.


You here to play the play,

Play it hard. Play it well.


The whole point of this,

Is only to remember that it is a PLAY after all.


That way, you’ll be able to play the most.

And Let the creation happen through you and AS YOU.




To be your authentic self is the most spiritual thing you can demonstrate.

Not denial, or resistance.

Don’t be afraid to desire.

Flow is effortless effort.

Anything otherwise, is an effort.

Trying to be in flow, is an effort.

So, just be.

The absolute can't be defined in words, it can only be experienced, but if you are open to being inspired to go within, don't miss this.


What you seek is seeking you. When you simply practice detachment. You get the answers.

Don't get messed up in the language, in the words, in the mind. Don't just simply read my words here. But look at what they are pointing towards. Know the essence of it and that essence of it is you. Have a great day!


Ready to build Conscious Relationships?

Here's how we can help.


Journeys of Self-Mastery

Using our 25,000+ hours of Coaching Experience, we have created DIY-style Coaching Sessions. We call them eLearning Journeys. Just the way we help a client in a private session, we have used the same approach and structure to create these journeys. Some of the popular eLearning Journeys are: A. Under Healing section: 1. How to Stop Being Taken for Granted 2. How to Set Healthy Boundaries 3. Healing the Attachments to Heal the Romance B. Under the Self-Improvement section: 1. Building Intimacy through Aligning Love Languages 2. 21 Days Body Detox Challenge

C. Under People Psychology section: 1. Demystifying Human Behaviour for Self-awareness 2. Overcoming Limiting Patterns for Healthy Mind Some of the popular Guided Meditations are: 1. Body Scan 2. Yog Nidra 3. Healing Light Some of the popular Subliminals are: 1. Releasing FOG (Fear, Obligation, Guilt) 2. Financial Prosperity and Abundance 3. Unshaken Courage, Confidence, and Will Power

The complete list of content is available from here. Your subscription gives you access to ALL this content - eLearning Journeys, Guided Meditations, Subliminals, Assessments, etc. Everything. Not only that, we regularly create and upload new content and you will have access to that also, as long as your subscription is Active! ALL the content is created by using the principles of Emotional Intelligence and Mindfulness. If you are wondering, should I subscribe or not, then consider this... If you are facing any of these challenges, then this System is for you: Feeling overwhelmed with your partner | Lack of Healthy Communication | Taking each other for granted | Fights over Financial Issues | War of Chores | Trust Issues | Incompatible life goals | Lack of Appreciation | Mismatched Sex Drives | Different Views on Parenting | Jealousy | Differences in Core Values | Unrealistic Expectations | Addictions | Being unsupportive | Not giving proper attention | Boredom | Monotony | Infidelity | Wanting different things from the relationship | Excessive controlling | Too many Arguments | Keeping score of mistakes | Lack of Responsibility on the part of one partner | Attraction outside of Relationship | Mental/Emotional Abuse by one partner | Manipulation | Speaking different love languages and many more.......... You can choose from 4 Subscription options - 1 Month, 3 Months, 6 Months, OR 12 Months. As long as you are an Active Member, you will have access to ALL the content - Present and Future. Once your subscription expires, you can choose to renew it using the available plans. We believe that it is possible to create and sustain an Intimate, Fulfilling, and Harmonious Relationship with your partner. If you don't have a partner right now, then also this applies to you.


Why? Because this is a journey of Self-Mastery.


It starts when you identify your emotional wounds, traumas, negative thought patterns, and unhealthy triggers. You don't need a partner for this. You first heal yourself and take charge of your life. Only when you heal yourself, will you resonate with another person who has also worked on themselves. When you are wounded, you will subconsciously attract those partners who are also wounded and struggling. Two wounded people don't make a Power Couple. Only two healed people make a Power Couple. Start your Transformation Journey with us for only ₹97. Check it out...



164 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page